quotes, thoughts, and more...

so today while reading a book i bought recently by paula rinehart called "strong women, soft hearts" i ran across these quotes, and they really hit me...

"Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered to us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at sea. We are far too easily pleased." ~ C. S. Lewis

"This may come as a surprise to you: Christianity is not an invitation to become a moral person. It is not a program for getting us into line or for reforming society.... At its core, Christianity begins with an invitation to desire. Christianity has nothing to say to the person who is completely happy with the way things are. Its message is for those who hunger and thirst - for those who desire life as it was meant to be." ~ John Eldredge

the first one initially caught my attention because i tend to view myself as a fairly easily pleased person, and i immediately questioned whether that was affecting my faith. quickly, i came to the conclusion that it does. i end up limiting God in a sense, because i often settle for things that are just "good enough" rather than waiting and trusting in His promise to bring me what He sees best. i always kind of thought of "desires" as being my own selfish wants that as a Christian i need be supressing, when in reality, God surely does want us to desire! He simply longs for us to turn our eyes unto Him and seek what will truly be fulfilling!

as far as the second quote goes... i always seem to be inspired by John Eldredge (you know me and the ever-famous "man book" - wild at heart - oh man, sometimes i still can't believe how much i learned from it). this one struck me because it's so easy to get distracted in the Christian life... to get discouraged by our constant failure in being "perfect" or moral, which isn't what it's about anyway, and we just end up feeling a failure. yes, of course we need to be striving toward righteousness, but we must not forget that foundational invitation to desire... to desire Christ and the richness of a life spent clinging to Him.

it's my hope and prayer that these words aren't just in vain, but that perhaps God will have spoken to you through this... as He did me. cool how specific men's and women's books can actually be of great benefit to anyone. leave comments to let me know what thoughts y'all have in regards to the quotes, if you'd like. blessings...

p.s. oops... i said "more" in the title, so i guess i better add something. certainly not at all on the same topic or level of importance for that matter, but... on tuesday the new rascal flatts album came out and i went over to moscow to pick it up that night. couldn't wait, of course. yeah, go ahead and laugh. ha ha. (see, i did.) they are my favorite band, though! anyway... i've so enjoyed listening the last few days - definitely some great new songs. kinda a slightly different sound this time around, i think. anyone heard it yet??

cooking & boys

for those who don't know, i am a house girl this year for a christian men's house on campus called the ucb (university christian brotherhood)... i was asked last year by the other two house girls if i'd like to join and i was thrilled at the opportunity. fourteen guys live in the ucb, which is located on greek row and is run somewhat similarly, in the sense that they have leadership positions and a weekly house meeting where they are required to dress up for and such. the guys are responsible for all their own meals except for on monday evenings when we cook for them before their meeting. we often try to make something sort of special - for example, tonight was baked salmon and this super fancy pesto pasta salad. anyway... doing this for them is such a joy and blessing to me! it's so much fun for several reasons - one being the fact i get to spend time with the other girls who are just wonderful to be around and have such wisdom, which i can learn from. secondly, it allows me to improve my cooking skills and test lots of new recipes. but most of all, i love being a house girl because it's an amazing experience each week to be surrounded by a group of christian guys who make it evident they love the Lord. as i sat at the table during tonight's dinner, i couldn't help but smile brightly. there was much laughter and joking this evening and it's always fun to observe the very "boyish" behavior. that aspect reminds me of being around my own brothers and is a comforting feeling. each of the guys seems so appreciative of what we do... and that makes it an even more rewarding experience. tonight especially, though, i just found myself overwhelmed with thankfulness for the chance to be a part of something like this. God continues to be faithful in providing me with ways to really feel at home here at wsu. so yes, cooking and boys are truly quite lovely things... : )

much pondering

it's been a busy week so far... i'm dealing with the same problem most wsu students are. it's that time of the semester - the first set of tests. ah well... it's been good for me to have to work. i was probably getting much too lazy.

one very exciting thing is that this coming weekend is campus crusade's fall retreat!! i'm looking forward to it as my heart is definitely in need of some focused time with God. once again, i find myself slightly overwhelmed by all that He's trying to teach me right now. some of the lessons are a bit hurtful, but i'm striving to be thankful for them all the same. recently i saw the need to step back and reevaluate some areas of my life, and it's been a very humbling experience. that is so good for me, though! i see my Father's continuous love through it all. He's simply reminding me of the fact life can be truly beautiful when i'm clinging to Him and Him alone. may my stubborness not get in His way any longer! let that be my heart's goal.

in one of my classes today - my lab (discussion section) for hd 205 - we each did a "self-disclosure" presentation. i wasn't particularly thrilled about it, 'cause i don't typically enjoy sharing about myself in large groups, but this time it was worthwhile. in preparation for what i was going to say, i rediscovered a few things about myself. one of them being my sense of creativity. i really have an artistic side, that lately, it seems i've hidden. why exactly, i'm not so sure. a part of it could stem from giving up my longtime dream of being an interior designer. i still wonder about that at times... because it was that very dream that brought me here to washington state. now, going into psychology, i really could be in school almost anywhere - but i have to trust this is where God wanted me. anyway, getting back on tack... we were required to have a visual component to our presentation, and i decided to use some of my black & white photos. while going through all my prints, i was struck by how much i miss that artsy part of me. perhaps i should start looking for ways to use those creative/artistic gifts God blessed me with. let that be another goal!

boy do i miss my family a lot. you'd think that in my second year being away from them it wouldn't be as bad. but it proves to still be a bit of a struggle. jordan and i are closer than ever these days, and it's hard to be away from him. he and i just get each other completely and we have a bond that can't be compared. i miss our deep talks and just laughing hysterically together about the most random stuff. oh, and talking in our own weird little language that no one else fully gets. that's awesome! it's also weird only being able to see johannah every few months. she's getting older now, so she's not changing quite so fast, but still, i feel like i miss many of those significant moments. as for josh, he's back up at western, so it's not like he's home either. we don't talk too often, but it's always good when we do. and mom... well, i miss her a great deal. we have an incredibly open and honest relationship that i treasure. it's not the same as face to face, but thankfully we have at least a couple quality phone conversations a week. funny how leaving my family made me appreciate them so much more. : )

okay, well, i certainly succeeded in writing a long post. hopefully y'all aren't bored out of your minds at this point. anyway... time to sleep! much love...

i wonder sometimes

...why my life seems so weird to me. this was definitely an interesting weekend... which included many unexpected events and encounters. perhaps that's why i ended up driving like 70 miles just in the last couple days! (granted, there were a few trips to moscow... but still... wow.) i actually accomplished a lot, though - that in itself is truly amazing! maybe my unmotivated attitude has ceased. that really would be wonderful... it's about time i got back on track. it was my plan to write a longish post tonight, but sadly, it's getting late, so i'm going to have to put that off. my psych statistics notes are awaiting me... test tomorrow - woo hoo!! love y'all... more soon.

i know...

you're probably wondering what's up with me and lyrics... well, it's simply that music seems to be saying things better than i'm able to right now. i first heard the song below sometime during late spring of senior year at the justin mcroberts concert i went to. while i was greatly affected by it then, i didn't think much of it until i heard it for the second time this past august right before leaving for school. i was sitting with sarah and it randomly came on (well, in God's eyes it surely was no accident). tears came to my eyes immediately as i listened to the harshly sung words. from my point of view, the word "love" in this song describes a unhealthy and/or ungodly relationship. without going into unnecessary detail, it illustrates a situation i recently found myself to be in. i was blessed to hear this song once again as it put things into perspective for me perfectly. and i thank my true loving Father for using it to help me heal.

"Love" performed by Justin McRoberts

Love...
Is it all that you want?
Is it everything you've hoped for?
Love...
Is it more than the word?
That you use when you look at her

Love!
It'll push you around
It'll make you a poor man
Change your picture of heaven, heaven
Love!
It'll make you a man
Then she'll make you a child again

Love...
Does it keep you awake?
Does it change everything you see?
Love...
Is it worth what you give?
Is it everything you need?

Love!
It'll push you around
It'll make you a poor man
Change your picture of heaven, heaven
Love!
It'll make you a man
Then she'll make you a child again

Love! Love!
Love! Love!

Love...
Is it all that you want?
Is it everything you've worked for?
Love...
Is it wearing you down?!

Love!
It'll push you around
It'll make you a poor man
Change your picture of heaven, heaven
Love!
It'll make you a man
Then she'll make you a child again

Love! Love!
Love! Love!

feels like today

rascal flatts' new album comes out in a couple weeks... their first single - the title track - is beautiful to me...


I woke up this mornin'
With this feeling inside me that I can't explain
Like a weight that I've carried, been carried away, away
But I know something is comin'
I don't know what it is
But I know it's amazing, can save me
My time is comin'
I'll find my way out, of this longest drought

And it feels like today, I know
It feels like today, I'm sure
It's the one thing that's missin'
The one thing I'm wishin'
The last sacred blessing
And hey, feels like today
Feels like today

You treat life like a picture
But it's not a moment that's frozen in time
It's not gonna wait 'til you make up my mind at all
So while this storm is breakin'
While there's light at the end of the tunnel
You keep runnin' towards it
Releasing the pressure, that's your heartache
Soon this dam will break

And it feels like today, I know
It feels like today, I'm sure
It's the one thing that's missin'
The one thing you're wishin'
The last sacred blessing
And hey, feels like today
Feels like today

It feels like today, I know
It feels like today, I'm sure
It's the one thing that's missin'
The one thing you're wishin'
The last sacred blessing
And hey, feels like today

Feels like, feels like your life changes
Feels like, feels like your life changes
It's the one thing that's missin'
The one thing you're wishin'
The last sacred blessing
And hey, feels like today
Feels like, feels like your life changes
Feels like today
Feels like, feels like your life changes

oh, so very, very sad

yes, it is actually me... writing on this blog. i'm slightly sickened by the fact it's been over two months since i've said a word here. perhaps that's because a lot of what was going on in my life was just plain unworthy of mentioning. however, my goal now is for that to change. this school year is the perfect opportunity to continue to grow and truly dig deeper. thanks be to God for his love, patience, and grace. more soon to come! (i promise... really.)